Kagura's Freedom
by Quen-celebrin
Summary: An expanded version of Kagura's death, from both Kagura's and Sesshomaru's perspectives. Dear Murgatroid, I love this pairing.
1. Kagura

"_Now go. Wherever you please."_

That's what Naraku said. 'Wherever you please.' I should be happy. But how can I be happy when my freedom will last... Hell, I don't even know if I'll live through the next hour.

I fly on the wind, barely thinking. My thoughts blur together into one dark haze. And I start to forget—everything. Except that I am dying. Every beat of my newly-restored heart pumps the poisonous miasma further into my body. Soon I will die.

I land—or fall out of the sky—I am not sure which. Not that it matters. Nothing matters anymore. I half-notice my surroundings—I've ended up in a clearing somewhere, shaded by the trees and carpeted thickly in fallen cherry blossoms. The breeze carries the petals near me, but I can barely smell their fragrance. I'm not sure whether it's because my nose is failing or perhaps because I have no interest in flowers anymore. Did I ever? I can't remember.

Where should I go? I still have time, don't I? Some time. I can go anywhere—anywhere the wind can take me. I'm _free_! I know this is important. I wanted to be free... so desperately. But now I can't remember why.

I try to get up. I'm _free_. I should go somewhere—anywhere. This can't be the end! But... I... can't move. I can barely feel my own body around me, let alone the breeze or the cherry blossoms. I only feel the beating of my heart. The sound is strange to me. I've never heard my heartbeat from so close before.

But all else is silence. It's so quiet... There's no one else here. Who would be here?

And I know that I am going to die. Not tomorrow. Not in an hour. Soon. I guess this is where it's going to end... all alone. So this is... the freedom I sought. Was it worth it?

At least this will be a pretty place to die. Maybe at least the breeze will remember me. The breeze... I hear something, a sound I thought would be too faint for me to hear by now. But I would recognize it anywhere—that sound, that scent, that aura.

_Sessho...maru_? My heart beats twice rapidly as I see him. And I remember. Not everything. But I remember him. His is the face I was trying to picture without even knowing it. But what is he doing here?

"I was following the scent of Naraku's miasma." His voice is deep, calm. This is nothing out of the ordinary, his voice tells me. Nothing special. But he is here.

And so I laugh in response, more ironic than amused. I can still laugh? "Disappointed? That it was... just me?" I ask. Talking is not easy, but my voice sounds stronger than I expected. Just seeing him makes me feel stronger. But not strong enough to look up at him while I wait for his answer. Well, I am not really waiting for an answer. I am waiting for him to leave—as silently as he came, not caring that I have only minutes left to live, at the most.

There is a pause. He says nothing for so long that I almost think he has gone without me noticing, but then he says softly, "I knew it was you." His voice is still calm, but I hear... something? I don't know. But suddenly my hearing has sharpened, and I can hear everything. His breath. My breath. The breeze still whisking its petals to and fro around us.

Both of our hearts beating.

He... "You knew..." And still... you came... Sesshomaru. Of course he knew. But he came... anyway. For me?

His hand moves to the more slender of the two swords slung at his waist. Is he going to kill me? If he is, I'm not sure whether it's because to make sure I die this time or out of mercy. Either way, I want to tell him it doesn't matter. I'll be gone soon anyway.

He looks at me, but not _at _me... He is looking for something. His eyes widen slightly... very slightly. I would not notice, except that all of my senses have heightened so much. Is that because my death is so close? A sign that I have only moments left to live? Sesshomaru's eyes half close, and he takes his hand from his sword hilt.

"Is this... _it_, then?" he asks. His tone is still calm, but that hesitation... it is the closest thing to emotion I have ever heard from him. For _me_?

He raises his eyes to me for a moment, waiting for an answer. How do I answer him? "Yes... but..." I pause. "It's all right now..." It doesn't matter now. If he knows... that I love him. It doesn't matter if _I_ know that I love him.

I hear something... someone coming? But the sound is faint. My senses are failing me once again, and I know that this is truly the end.

But I am... _so_... happy. Sesshomaru _knew_... and he still came. For me. His gaze is lowered once again, and I stare shamelessly. His long silver hair, falling into his golden eyes. The corners of his mouth turned ever so slightly downward. The marks on his forehead and cheekbones. The points of his ears. I memorize every detail of him.

And it really doesn't matter. As soon as I saw him, I didn't care anymore if I died. My eyes lock onto his. I was able to see you... one last time... Sesshomaru.

I have no regrets.

I love you.

As I die, I am smiling.

* * *

I am dead. Aren't I? But this is not hell, and although it seems closer to heaven, it's not that either. I... have no body anymore. But my soul still lives—and I still feel the wind around me. Around... no, not around me. I _am _the wind.

I have become the wind.

I am truly free.

And it _was_ worth it.

Sesshomaru is still there. I do not see him, or smell him—winds do not have eyes. But I... feel him. Sesshomaru. I can't ever say the words to him, but that's all right. He knows.

Maybe he will defeat Naraku one day, but I don't really care anymore. Naraku has no power over me. I am _free_. But I allow myself to caress him once—just once. I stay warm and gentle.

I love you.

No. I _loved _you.

And with his face emblazoned in my old memory and the feel of him shining in my new memory, I blow away. And now _I_ toss the cherry blossoms downward as I continue on into my new beginning.

_I am free_.

* * *

It did not take many years for Kagura to forget Sesshomaru—after all, a breeze is not renowned for its long memory—nor, for that matter, are a gale or a tornado. And she was all three at times.

But she always retained an inexplicable fondness for dogs, for deep voices, and for long, thick hair she could ruffle as she whistled along.


	2. Sesshomaru

I am walking—no where particular, at this moment—when I smell it. Naraku's foul miasma. And something else... some_one _else.

I suppose my idiot half-brother and other less powerful demons cannot distinguish between the scents of Naraku and his various incarnations. I can, of course. And now I smell Kagura's scent mixed in with the miasma.

And the scent of her blood.

I am not sure what makes me change my direction, but I know that now my steps are carrying me toward her.

And I am not sure why I am running.

Suddenly I realize the sound that has been ringing in my ears for some time now. A heartbeat. _Kagura's_ heart? Maybe that is why I am running. Even Naraku is not stupid enough not to know that she has been trying to kill him almost since he created her. If he has freed her, it can't be for anything good.

But even if she is dying, it doesn't matter. I have Tenseiga. There is nothing to worry about. So why is my heart beating too fast? And why am I running even faster?

I have slowed to a walk by the time I reach her. I barely notice the cherry blossoms on the ground or the sunlight filtering through the leaves above us.

The wind witch sits, her head bowed. She does not cry. I have never seen her so... hopeless. And the miasma wraps around her, choking. Killing. The steady beating of her heart seems mocking. She is free at last. And she has never been so trapped.

It takes a moment for her to sense me. Her head raises suddenly, the movement jerky and graceless. Her mouth and eyes open wide as she sees me. Her heart beats twice as fast. Her heart... She says nothing, just staring in disbelief. Is she so surprised that I have come?

"I was following the scent of Naraku's miasma," I say coolly. This is true, but it is only part of the truth. And I am still not sure exactly what the other part is.

She laughs once, mirthlessly. Her gaze drops as she asks lightly, "Disappointed? That it was... just me?" Joking. Raising walls around her newly-restored heart.

I say nothing for a long moment. Then I watch her defenses shatter as I reply calmly, "I knew it was you."

Her eyes widen and she looks up for just a moment, hope and fear and something else mixing in her glowing red eyes.

She looks down again as she repeats softly, "You knew..." Her voice is not hoarse, or weak, or rasping. But she speaks very slowly, very gently. Like she is singing the last verse of a lullaby.

It is silly for me to be reacting like this. It is silly that my heart skipped a beat when I first saw her here, and it is ridiculous that looking at her makes me afraid. I raise my hand to Tenseiga's hilt. It will only take one swing. I will revive her and then be on my way.

I look at her broken body, searching for the messengers of the netherworld. My heart turns over when I do not see them—I see only the miasma. Curling around her in an awful parody of an embrace. The beat of her heart is slowing.

Tenseiga can't save her.

"Is this... _it_, then?" It's a stupid question. There is no hope left. Not even Tenseiga... What is the use in having a sword I never even wanted? That can only be used to _save _lives? That cannot even be used to save those whom I... care... about?

Yes. I do care about her. It's not that unreasonable. She is a full demon, attractive, relatively powerful. She would not shame me as a mate.

But a deep part of me that I usually ignore tells the truth. Even if she was not powerful, not as beautiful... if she was a half demon... or even human. I look at her. I would still...

"Yes," she says. Answering the question I had almost forgotten I asked her. She pauses, and then continues slowly, "...but... It's all right now..."

Her heart is beating faster now, too fast. The end is here. I half-hear someone approaching—my idiot half-brother and his companions, by the sound of it. I ignore them.

I look at Kagura, but I cannot look her in the face. I watch her from under half-lidded eyes. I see her staring at me, too, as her eyes grow dull and start to close.

And then she smiles. I can read everything in her heart and her mind in that one smile.

As she falls back, the smile still on her face, I finally realize. I loved her.

In a moment, she is gone.

* * *

I can no longer ignore the noise made by the approach of my idiot half-brother and his... friends. I feel a surge of distaste for him. I had almost decided to allow myself a few minutes. To stand there, where she died, and allow my unruly heart to settle.

But it does not matter. I begin to walk on my way.

I hear Inuyasha's woman speak. "Wind," she says wonderingly. Yes. Kagura has become the wind. She is truly free at last. As I think it, I feel a breeze caress me, warm and scented with cherry blossoms... and something else.

Kagura. In a moment, she is gone—for good now.

The boy who travels with Inuyasha says something I do not hear. I walk on.

Suddenly his voice stops me. "Hold it, Sesshomaru!"

I do not have to stop... but I do. I half-turn toward him. What does he want?

Apparently the woman wonders too, because she says his name as a question.

"Tell me," Inuyasha starts, his voice still almost a shout, but then he pauses. More quietly, he asks, "Did she suffer?"

I pause and look up. She is not here anymore. She could be anywhere by now. But I still feel her touch on my skin. I say nothing for a long moment. Deciding what to say. Ensuring that my voice will not betray the emotion I feel as I relive her last moments.

For a few blessed moments, there is silence. I watch as the feather that used to be tucked into her hair is tossed on a breeze high above us. _I loved her_. "She was smiling," I say at last.

And I walk away—away from my half brother, and the scent of the cherry blossoms, and the memory of the only woman I will ever love.


End file.
